What is Postpartum Rage or Anger? Therapist Shares 8 Tools for Coping with Mom Rage
Postpartum Support Near Me
Are you or someone you know struggling with a Postpartum Mood Disorder in Chicago or beyond? Finding the right support is crucial in navigating this challenging time.
In this article, we will explore the symptoms of Postpartum Anger and 8 coping strategies. Let's dive in and learn more about how to find the support you need.
What are the Symptoms of Postpartum Anger?
You feel angry at your husband for having more freedom to leave the house.
Or you feel frustrated with your baby for crying too loudly/not sleeping/spitting up again.
No one understands how bad you feel. Your anger feels justified in the moment.
So you lash out at your kids or partner, sometimes even at the smallest things.
You feel guilty about yelling at them. You don’t recognize yourself.
Because you can’t seem to control your temper, you feel like a failure.
And then the cycle repeats.
Is Postpartum Anger a Sign of Postpartum Depression?
Being a mom is f*cking hard. We all know it. Postpartum depression and anxiety receive significantly more attention, but postpartum anger comes with its own set of challenges. It’s actually quite common, though underreported. There is so much shame around this behavior. After all, mothers are supposed to be “patient, kind, loving,” right?
Therapists like to refer to anger as a “secondary emotion,” because it’s often triggered by other emotions. Take a moment to think, “What is my anger trying to tell me?” Postpartum anger is often triggered by unmet needs, like feeling unsupported, sleep deprived, touched out, or alone. It may be a symptom of postpartum anxiety, postpartum depression, or postpartum PTSD, but it can exist independently.
Mothers who describe themselves as “highly sensitive people” struggle even more. Sounds and touch can feel like an assault, like the baby’s cries, your toddler’s screams, or your partner’s embrace.
8 Strategies to Cope with Postpartum Anger
Schedule a wellness check with your doctor. Emotional disregulation can also be a symptom of thyroid disfunction or nutritional imbalances. It is important to rule out these factors.
Monitor your mood. Regularly monitor your mood using an "anger scale" to gauge frustration levels on a scale from 1 to 10. Implement strategies like deep breathing, a quick walk, or stretching if you find yourself at a 6 or 7. Use tools like a smartwatch or apps such as iMood to set reminders for self-check-ins.
When triggered, give yourself a break. Safely place your baby down and step into another room for a few deep breaths. Mothers often feel like they can’t or shouldn’t do this, but this simple act can be an effective coping tool.
Establish a strong foundation. Address sleep, movement, nutrition, and personal time. Unmet needs in these areas often contribute to postpartum rage.
Broaden your support system. Do you have neighbors or friends who can hold the baby while you rest? Does your partner need to take on more responsibilities? Consider redistributing responsibilities to ensure you have time for self-care. Mothers are often hesitant or resistant to ask for help, but can benefit significantly from mastering this essential skill.
Learn repair skills. Develop repair skills for reconnecting with your children or partner after an outburst. Apologize, listen to their concerns, and physically reconnect through gestures like hugs. Remember, even parents who do not struggle with postpartum mood disorders experience ruptures in their relationships.
Treat yourself with kindness. I know, easier said than done. Recognize that this phase is temporary and you are not causing lasting harm to your children.
Seek professional support from a therapist. Therapy with a specialist in postpartum mood and anxiety disorders can help you learn coping skills, practice self-advocacy, practice repair techniques, and cultivate self-compassion.
Are You Interested in Learning More About Postpartum Anger Chicago?
If you need additional support and tools managing postpartum rage or other postpartum mood disorders, please reach out. As a therapist in Chicago, I see clients in Illinois, Minnesota, Washington, Indiana, and Michigan. I have my Certification in Perinatal Mental Health, so I am uniquely skilled to help mothers just like you.
Online Therapy Services Offered at Empathic Counseling Services in Evanston, Chicago, and Beyond
Ivy Ellis, LCSW PMH-C is a licensed mental health therapist dedicated to helping overwhelmed adults feel better about themselves and their lives in Evanston, Chicago, and beyond. Ivy’s niche specialties include supporting Autistic/ND adults, anxious adults, and pregnant and postpartum women. Ivy, at Empathic Counseling Center, offers online therapy for adults in Illinois, Minnesota, Washington, Indiana, and Michigan.