Everything You Need to Know About Social Anxiety Disorder
What is Social Anxiety Disorder?
If you have Social Anxiety Disorder, you know it’s way more than feeling shy! Social Anxiety is paralyzing, and really interferes with enjoying life. You want to make friends, audition for a play, or go for that job promotion- but Social Anxiety Disorder is the fire-breathing dragon blocking your way.
Social Anxiety Disorder is a recognized mental health condition in the DSM-5, and in simpler terms, it means:
You consistently fear one or more social situations.
You worry about being judged by others.
You feel anxious when faced with social situations.
You realize your fear is overblown.
You often avoid the social situations that make you anxious.
This disorder is different from Generalized Anxiety Disorder, which involves excessive worry about various aspects of daily life like health, work, school, and relationships.
What Does Social Anxiety Disorder Feel Like?
Individuals with Social Anxiety Disorder often describe the experience as:
Mind going blank
Sweating
Stomach issues
Tearing up
Blushing
Tight chest
Racing heartbeat
Second-guessing thoughts
Headache
Shaky voice
Replaying and overthinking conversations after the interaction
Tips for Managing Social Anxiety
It might seem like everyone else has their act together, but it's important to understand: self-confidence isn't something you're born with or without. You can actually practice and build it up over time. So when you’re struggling in a social setting, remember that things don't always have to stay the way they are now.
Understanding yourself and identifying situations where you thrive or struggle is key to managing Social Anxiety. This means that you get to decide which social events work best for you. If big parties stress you out, opt for smaller gatherings. Choosing activities that align with your comfort level opens doors to more positive social experiences.
When you're grappling with Social Anxiety in social or performance situations, the anxiety response kicks in, leading to symptoms like a tight chest and sweating. Interestingly, of all the body parts affected by stress, we have the most control over our lungs and muscles. So by consciously slowing down our breathing and loosening up our muscles, we can kickstart the relaxation response, signaling other body parts to relax as well. This calms the physical anxiety response, which in turn can make it easier to navigate social situations.
Overcoming Social Anxiety Step-by-Step
Taking small steps is key when tackling something like Social Anxiety. This exercise can be done with any feared situation. For example, let's break down the challenge of making friends as an adult step-by-step:
Go somewhere to meet people
Notice people surrounding you
Approach someone
Start a conversation
Find a common activity or interest
Ask them to meet sometime
Swap contact info if excited
Meet up and hang out
Repeat
Identify where you're struggling in this sequence. What can you do to fix this specific issue? Is it an emotional or skills-based issue? What are you willing to try to move towards your goal of making friends? What are you willing to tolerate in order to move towards your goal of making friends?
If it's a skills problem, like not knowing how to start a conversation, practice some conversation starters. If emotions are the hurdle, especially with Social Anxiety, find an intervention that helps you manage and cope with those emotions. This might involve strategies like gradual exposure to social situations, defusion techniques, or seeking support through therapy. The key is to recognize that progress is made by addressing each problem in the sequence at your own pace. Celebrate small wins, and be kind to yourself during the struggles.
As an anxiety and trauma online therapist based in Chicago, I help adults struggling with Social Anxiety Disorder.
Ivy Ellis, LCSW at Empathic Counseling Center can provide you with coping strategies, tools to manage anxious thoughts, and a safe space to explore and understand your fears. She is dedicated to helping overthinkers and overwhelmed adults. Ivy’s niche specialties include supporting Autistic/ND adults, anxious adults, and pregnant and postpartum women. Ivy, at Empathic Counseling Center in Evanston, Chicago, and beyond, offers online therapy for adults in Illinois, Minnesota, Washington, Indiana, and Michigan.